EPISODE #302

You're listening to School Leadership Reimagined, episode number 302

How do builders like us make a dramatic difference in the lives of our students in spite of all the obstacles we face? How do you keep your vision for your school from being held hostage by resistant teachers, uncooperative parents, ridiculous district policies, or lack of time, money, or resources? If you're facing those challenges right now, here is where you'll find the answers, strategies, and actionable tips you need to overcome any obstacle you face. You don't have to wait to make a difference in the lives of the people you serve. You can turn your school into a success story right now with the people and resources you already have. Let's get started.

Hey, builders, welcome to another episode of the School Leadership Reimagined podcast.

I'm your host, Robin Jackson. And today I want to ask you something. Have you ever been sitting in a meeting with your colleagues and maybe your principal supervisor is there as well, and you feel like at some point you are speaking a completely different language. You're talking about building something bigger. You're talking about your your 100% vision. You're talking about creating real, lasting change. You're talking about eliminating problems altogether. And all you get back is skepticism or doubt or people kind of nod politely before they move on to the next agenda item.

And then you start to wonder that maybe you're being unrealistic. Maybe this 100% vision isn't, you know, isn't it's a realistic right now or that you're being too idealistic with that vision. Maybe you think, you know, I might be pushing too hard. Or, you know, you start to wonder if maybe you should just start to just play the game like everybody else. Because here you are talking about something bigger, but nobody else is talking about it. Nobody even seems to think that it's realistic or possible for you. And then when that happens, you know, over time you start to feel like your passion and your belief begins to erode. It's not that you don't believe in 100%.

You honestly do. You just wonder if it's possible, and you wonder if if maybe you're being, you know, kind of unrealistic and it doesn't happen all at once. It starts to happen kind of little by little and that the voices around you start creating doubt. The voices around you start making you wonder if maybe you're a little crazy. The voices around you start making you think maybe you should just kind of fall back in line. Now, if that has ever happened to you, then today's episode's going to be really important. I've talked to a lot of people who say they listen to the podcast to kind of get re anchored. They listen and I'm and I'm so thrilled.

But this podcast isn't enough because every single day you are surrounded by people who don't believe in your vision. They don't believe in your core values. And so today I want to ask you just a really simple question. Who's in your ear? Who, who, who is, is, is, is subtly shaping how you see this process? And are they helping you build the school that you've always envisioned, or are they slowly dragging you back towards the status quo? So we're going to talk about something that doesn't get nearly enough attention. And, and, and, and, and, and we we ignore it.

We don't understand how the outsized role that your tribe plays on how you think and how you see this work. 

You see the people that you surround yourself with, they are either fueling your vision or they're making you doubted. And so if you're feeling stuck or frustrated or just alone in your work, and it's, it's probably not because things aren't working out or you're not doing something right. I mean, we all face frustrations, but builders see those frustrations and those challenges and work through them, and leaders get discouraged by those frustrations. So it's not your frustrations that are the issue. What's really at issue is your tribe. Who's in your ear? Who are you listening to?

What's really at issue? If you're feeling like you're stuck and there's no way out, I want to ask you, who are you in the room with? Who are you listening to? Who's your tribe? And so my goal is that by the end of this episode, you're going to know exactly how to evaluate who's influencing you. You're going to be able to start to pick up on those subtle influences that are shaping the way that you do your work. And you are also going to start to recognize those voices that are holding you back and then find the right people, find the right tribe, people who challenge you and support you and, and, and believe in your vision. So let's go ahead and get into it.

So the first challenge that you often to face when it comes to your tribe is your supervisor, right? So that's the most obvious one. And a lot of times, though, the way that you are being supervised can directly impact your thinking and can start to erode your belief in your vision. So I see this happening all the time where people are, are, you know, they, they, they, they come in to be you. They're so excited about buildership and about 100% they create their vision. They create their vision story, they share it with their staff. Their staff gets excited about it. They create a one plan that shows them exactly how they're going to achieve their vision. They get even more excited. They share it with their staff. The staff gets excited and then their supervisor steps in. And their supervisor is coming from a traditional leadership mindset that's focused on compliance and test scores and short term gains instead of true transformation. And their supervisor begins to raise doubt. And there's not going to be a supervisor who's going to tell you. I don't think. I mean, I shouldn't say that.

I would be surprised if your supervisor told you, you know, 100% no, we don't want to serve all kids, but they do it in subtle ways. They say, well, I mean, that's very ambitious. And we know, let's let's, you know, I, I love your zeal, but maybe we should, you know, we, we got, you know, we can't save them all. And, you know, we need to focus on just this, the 5% gains that the district is asking for right now. But all of those things over time can begin to erode at your belief in your 100% vision because you're just not getting any support around that. And the other thing that happens is that the supervisor ask you to do work that is not aligned with your vision. You're, you're trying to solve big problems. And there's, you know, saying how many did you get into your 3 classrooms a day? And where did you upload it into the, the, the district management system? Or they come in and they want to talk to you about lunch schedules. When you're trying to talk about, you know, thinking about the master schedule and doing something differently, They, you come with innovative ideas and they just kind of say, oh, you know, I mean, that's, that's, that's, that's really sweet, that's nice.

But you know, right now we need to focus on this. 

And so over time, the people who are giving you feedback, the people who are giving you direction can start to erode at your belief in your vision. And if you don't have somebody else in your ear kind of saying, no, that's leadership, No, your vision is still valid. No, that work is not going to move forward. And then giving you, you know, showing, talking, helping you brainstorm ways around that.

Then you can quickly get stuck in compliance, get stuck in the traditional leadership mold, get stuck in the way things, things have always been done in your district and not move forward towards your vision. And so the danger here is, you know, I'm not going to tell you not to listen to your supervisor, but the danger here is that if that's the only voice in your head, that voice begins to drown out your own voice, the voice that says that there is a different way. You know, you start out wanting to create real, lasting change, but they can't see your vision. They have skepticism about your vision. And you begin to absorb that and you begin to think, well, maybe there's something wrong with me. And over time, you begin to to to kind of scale yourself back just to fit in. So instead of boldly pursuing your 100% vision, you start playing it more safe. You start focusing on what's reasonable and what's expected.

And then if you keep up, you'll begin to make decisions based on getting their approval rather than what's truly best for kids. And you might be thinking, no way, that will never happen. But I've seen it happen all too much where the if the whole district is heading in One Direction and you are the outlier. And those are the only voices you're hearing in very subtle but powerful ways. You begin to scale back. You begin to slow down. You begin to think, well, I can't move forward because I don't have support. I can't move forward because people will, you know, look at me and they'll think I'm the outlier and everybody else is going this direction.

Maybe I should just do it too. And without even realizing it, you start playing it safe. And that's kind of the trap of just looking to your leaders for leadership when you're a builder, right? Because most districts unfortunately go for compliance driven leadership rather than buildership. And so if you're surrounded by people and you're being supervised by people, you're giving given feedback by people who don't believe 100% success is really possible, their doubts begin to start shaping your thinking. OK, Now the second thing that often happens, it's not just your supervisors, right? It's also your colleagues. And, and so there's a hidden cost because what a lot of builders do is they say, all right, well, I'm just going to tune that out.

I'll do what they need to do, but I'm going to focus on my vision. 

And then the second challenge is that a lot of times your colleagues don't get it either. So, so you're, you're because you, you, you are doing things so differently than your colleagues. You're playing a completely different game. You're operating on a completely different level. So your principal colleagues are focused on managing the day-to-day. You're working on 100% success. Your, your principal colleagues are focused on getting rid of teachers.

You're focused on building your teachers, teachers to help them become master teachers. Your principal colleagues are focused on compliance and your focus on transformation. And so they over time, you just have less and less in common with your principal colleagues because you are pursuing 100% vision. They don't even believe it's possible. And so that means that you a lot of times builders are peerless in your district. You just don't have any true peers. Your your colleagues may your colleagues may respect you, but they don't really get what you're trying to do. And that is so lonely.

And then on top of that, once you start making real progress and you start having these amazing gains, it starts to make other people uncomfortable because they've been making excuses for years about why it can't be done and you're over here doing it. They've been for years complaining that they couldn't get results and accepting the status quo. And you've completely upended the status quo. And so your success forces them to confront their failures. Your success challenges all of the assumptions that have comforted them in their mediocrity. And now all of a sudden you are saying no. It can be different. That makes a lot of people uncomfortable.

You might face some jealousy and instead of celebrating your wins, people will start to downplay your wins. They'll start to say, well, you know, that will work at your school, but that wouldn't work at my school. Or will you just have, you know, your staff is just an easier staff? I've got a tougher staff, so I couldn't do that or well, you know, I mean, that was great, but let's see if you can do the same thing next year. And that level of passive aggressive jealousy, that level of skepticism, that that level of doubt is less about you and more about them. But it doesn't mean that it doesn't affect you. And what may happen is you may feel more and more pressure to fit in rather than stand out.

You may start to feel more isolated and and alone.

And the emotional toll toll of not having like minded peers, of being peerless is that over time, you begin to start questioning yourself, you know, and see, or you feel always defensive or you have these great successes, but you just, you know, instead of, instead of being celebrated, everybody treats you like, you know, I don't know, like you're, you're the outlier. And that you, you, you start to feel lonely because nobody's really happy for you. And it can create this, this real sense of isolation. And there's a danger in trying to do this work in isolation. You, you know, when you, you, you, you forget that there are other builders out there who are doing the same thing, going through the same thing, believing the same thing that you're believing. And the more you start to think you're the only one, the more you begin to question yourself, the lonelier you get, the more isolated you get. And so the work, instead of being fun and exciting and thrilling, it feels isolating and, and, and, and creates more barriers. And instead of celebrating your wins, you, you go trying to downplay them and hide them because you just, you're sick of people being jealous.

You're sick of people saying those little snarky things that people say, say when they're, when they're being jealous. And, and you start to wonder, am I crazy? Am I crazy for believing in 100% success? Let me let me stop you right now and let you know you're not crazy. You're just not around the right people, right? If you're constantly surrounded by people who don't believe, those doubts can creep into your own thinking. When you're around people who are believe like you believe you don't have those doubts, you begin to encourage each other. So if you're feeling those doubts right now, it's likely because you're around the wrong people.

If you're feeling alone right now and and, and isolated and you feel like you're the only one, you're not. But if you feel that way, then it's because you're not around the right people. You see, You need a community of people who see you, who believe in you, who believe in what you're trying to do, who understand it because they're doing it too. They're not watching from the sidelines. They're out there fighting every day for kids just like you are. And when you, the difference it makes when you have those kinds of people is that you feel empowered to do what other people deem crazy. You feel excited about your work. You feel like you can celebrate, truly celebrate your wins because you know nobody's going to be jealous of you.

They're going to be excited for you. And when they have wins, you can be inspired by their wins. I don't know if this has ever happened to you, but this often happens to builders. They are sitting in A room with their principal colleagues and their principal colleagues are bragging about their 3% gain or we didn't. We didn't make any gains. We didn't lose anything this year. They're bragging about, Oh my goodness, we, we, we are able to get 75% attendance. They're bragging about, you know, getting rid of teachers. They're bragging about all of these little tiny incremental gains and then the builder sitting in the room, they're feeling weird because they're, while those people are bragging about 3% gains or 5% gains, they just made a 17% leap. When those people are bragging about getting rid of teachers. These people are are, are are builders are experiencing just exponential teacher growth. And they had a teacher who was really struggling who's now becoming one of their best teachers. And they've been able to turn this turn things around for this teacher. And not only that, they are they, they have other teachers who are clamoring to get into for their school because the reputation has preceded them. And those teachers know that in that school, they're going to get support.

And in that school, they have an opportunity to make a real difference.

While other people are bragging about their 75% attendance, they're shocked. Like if they got 75% attendance, they would feel like they're doing something wrong because they regularly are getting 9899% attendance for their schools. And so a lot of times when you're around the wrong people, instead of celebrating your wins, builders shut up 'cause they're wins people just don't get. They're just so much bigger than everybody else's wins. They just don't want to put a target on their back. If you're feeling like you are shrinking yourself, you know, maybe not hiding your wins, but reluctant to bring up your wins because you don't want to make other people feel bad or you don't want to bring undue attention to yourself. If you feel like the you're you're sitting in a room and you're listening and you can't relate because you're seeing people reach too low and you're so far beyond that. If you feel like when your colleagues are talking about compliance stuff and problems, you don't, you can't relate because you eliminated those problems a long time ago.

That's a sign that you're around the wrong people. That's a sign that you are in the wrong room. Hey, Robin here, and I just want to break in real quick to ask you a huge favor. You see, I want to get the word out to everybody about buildership, and I could use your help. If you're really enjoying this episode, would you mind just going to your podcast platform and leaving a quick review? You see the reviews get the word out. They tell other people this is a great show. Other people who have never heard of School Leadership reimagined before can hear about it, and you'd be sharing the word about buildership.

So would you mind just leaving a quick review? It would mean the world to me. OK, now back to the show. And so the thing that builders need to recognize is that who is in your ear matters. Who you're around and who you surround yourself with matters because if you are listening to the wrong voices, you may not see it right away, but there's a subtle influence that that is that is eroding at your passion for your vision and your belief in your vision and your confidence and your belief in yourself. So who you're surrounded by, who you listen to, who is in your ear shapes how you see your work. And it's always, it's not always intentional, right?

Sometimes those voices aren't mean or targeted or, or toxic or malicious.

They're just misaligned. And so it's not that these people are trying to tear you down, it's just that they, they don't get you. They don't get what you're trying to do. You all are playing two totally separate games. So imagine it, you know, imagine that you're on the field and you are playing, you're playing cricket and everybody else around you is playing hopscotch. And so you're trying to do things and they're like, why are you doing that? Why are you moving this way? Why are you doing this?

And you're watching them hop and you're like, why are you hopping? We, we, we, we should be moving. I don't know cricket, so I don't even know what you're supposed to do in cricket. But you get my point. You're playing two totally separate games and they don't get what you're doing. And what they're doing doesn't make sense to you either. And yet you're on the field. So what's going to happen if you stay there?

If you stay on that playing field and try to play your game on their field, over time your game suffers and you will start to drift towards their game. You cannot play their game on their field. You have to move fields. You have to go into a field with other cricket players. You have to be able to play because play with people who get what you are trying to do. That doesn't mean leave your district or leave your school, but it does mean that you have to be careful and mindful about the voices in your ear, right? And so when it comes to your supervisors, their job is often focused more on compliance than it is on transformation. And so their model is about managing failure rather than eliminating failure.

That they're always going to set low expectations for you. Don't look at their expectations for you and think that's this far as you can go. You'll pass. You'll blow past those expectations so you don't have to pay attention to them. You do you. You become a builder because becoming a builder is going too far exceed what they want from you anyway. So if you don't do that, you will start to internalize our low expectations and you're going to start shrinking your vision into their very tiny, tiny, tiny model.

Then you got to think about your colleagues, right?

If you are around a whole bunch of colleagues who just don't get it, even if they're good principals, even if they're nice people, they may be stuck in a traditional leadership model and so focused on incremental change that they don't get your 100%. It just doesn't even make sense to them. And they're comfortable where they are. They're comfortable playing the game and keeping their heads down and doing what's expected and avoiding pushback. And so when you're trying to make moves, they might try to talk you down. They might start saying, you know, listen, you're working too hard, you're trying to do too much too fast, you're moving too fast. Maybe you should wait for the district and, and, and let them kind of guide things or we've tried that before. It doesn't work.

And what happens is all of these voices, even from well meaning colleagues, can create doubt and hesitation for you. And then there are those voices from people who see what you're doing and and they see it as a threat to themselves. And so they're going to actively resist what you're trying to do. They may say things like, listen, that's not how things work here or you're making us look bad. I've actually heard that before. It's, it's insane your success is making us look bad. Or you know, you'll, you'll have a supervisor who comes in and says, listen what you're trying to do that's above your pay grade. Stay in your lane and a lot of time if you don't have counter voices in your ear saying, no, this is your lane.

Counter voices in your ear are saying, yeah, you don't do things the way that way here. And that's why we're stuck here. We need something different. Counter voices in your head that says don't worry about making other people look bad, Worry about making your kids look good. If there's not another voice in your head telling you, hey, listen, don't listen to them. You're on the right track. Keep going. What you're doing is valuable.

It means something. Keep, keep moving forward. Then when things get hard, the, the, the naysayers, the, the, the, the doubt that you hear from your colleagues and from your supervisors, that stuff starts to take root in you and it starts making you question if 100% is truly possible. So I guess the point of today's episode is that I want you to ask yourself, who are you letting influence the way that you do your work? What are the voices that are in your head the most? And are those voices pulling you forward towards your 100% vision or are they starting to make you slow down, hesitate, question yourself, pull back? Do the voices that you listen to are, do they actually believe in you?

Do they believe in 100% success?

Or are they trying to make you more quote UN quote realistic? If you are hesitating right now, if you are starting to doubt, if you feel like you are the only one, today's episode is for you because I want you to know you're not crazy and you're not the only one. In fact, if you're starting to to question yourself, if you feel like you're speaking a different language than your colleagues or that you are, you're playing a different game than your colleagues, it's not because you're wrong. It's because you're in the wrong room. You're around the wrong people. You see, builders don't fit the traditional mold. They're not meant to fit that mold. They're they're builders are about breaking that mold on behalf of kids.

So if you are feeling like you don't fit in, you're not wrong. You don't fit in. And you need to start thinking about finding a tribe that thinks like you, that that challenges you, that reinforces your vision, that believes in you, not one that's going to make you question your vision. Because proximity is, is important. Who you're around, who who you surround yourself with, who's in your ear is important. Success is contagious. If you want to think bigger and do more than you need to be around people who are already doing it. You need to be around people who are already thinking bitter, bigger and already doing more.

And that means you need to find other builders because when you find other builders, rather than questioning, is this something I can do, builders will start saying, hey, of course you can do it. Let's figure out how to make it happen. Instead of questioning, is this unrealistic? Builders will say, hey, no, 100% success. And it may not be realistic right now with what you're doing right now, but what would you have to shift in order for 100% success to be, to be the norm? Instead of thinking I'm the only one thinking this way, you can start thinking I've got this whole network of people who are building When when you start to to feel like this isn't going to work, you can look at somebody else who's already making it work. When you come in from a meeting and you feel discouraged because your supervisor doesn't get it and you start to think maybe I'm crazy, you can be around a whole bunch of other people who are also just as crazy as you are and who believe it and who are making it happen. You need to be around other builders because who you're around shapes how you think and, and, and, and it can be for good or for evil.

So I want you to question your tribe, the people you're around. 

Doesn't mean you break up with people and stop being friends with people. But you do want to ask yourself if are the only voices I hear doubters, naysayers, people who don't believe in me because over time that's going to rode your belief? Or am I also surrounding myself with people who believe, people who who get it, people who are also working towards 100% success, people who don't tolerate excuses and instead look for solutions. People who instead of giving me skepticism, help me figure out my strategy. People who instead of pushing back, are partnering with me in the work and encouraging me and believe undoubtedly that I can achieve something. So one of the things that we are doing, and we're going to be opening this up at the end of the month, is that we're going to create that kind of community. Because all too often I just run into people who tell me, you know, they, they're the only ones, they're all by themselves or they think they are.

And I, I, I, I am in touch every day with hundreds of people who are builders, who, who are, who are doing it differently. And the problem is they're all kind of disconnected all over the place. And although I'm connected with them, they're not connected with each other. And so we are going to be building this month a buildership community. And inside the community, you're going to get a couple of things. First of all, we will be creating a space. It's not going to be in Facebook. We're creating our own platform where you can just talk to other builders.

So, you know, you got in those Facebook groups and like you post something like you're really asking for help or you see somebody else posting something where they're really asking for help. And then all these snarky comments come in and, you know, people beat people up because they're asking sincere questions. No, that's not this. We are vetting people who come into the community. We're being very careful about moderating the community. So it's a safe place for you to ask questions. As for help? And then we're even creating a space for you to celebrate your wins.

So if nobody else is happy for you, you know that we can be happy for you. 

And you can also, in those days when you really feel encouraged, just read through all the wins that people are getting and know that there's a win waiting for you as well. So we're creating that community. It's not just a community because in addition to that, we're also going to provide the PD you're not getting in your district. So we are going to be working at the community will have once or twice a month, we'll get people together to focus on master classes that are really practical and focused on the things that you're going through right now. So we just did a master class well last week on five in five outs, which is really about creating vertical alignment. So good. The recording of that, if you missed it, it's going to be inside the community.

We're doing a master class on master scheduling and looking at some different ways of dealing with master scheduling challenges. Probably something you've not heard before going to be in a master class. We have master classes on how to motivate your teachers. We have master classes on just really practical things that the, and we've designed them so that right around the time of the school year when those challenges are coming up, there's a master class there. And so you get those master classes, but you also get the archive of all the other ones we've done so that they, they, they exist as a resource for you. And we're going to create and we have in the, in the community, some builders playbook. So we're going to be dropping new builders playbooks, you know, regularly. And there's already a library of playbooks in there.

And these are just kind of step by step instructions on how to do simple things like how to conduct a leadership team meeting, how a step by step instructions on on hiring and setting up your hiring process for those of you who are recruiting for the year, how to conduct student focus groups to get really meaningful feedback from kids. All of those playbooks are in there. They just step by step how to create core values as a school step by step. All those playbooks are in there too so that you can get not only the community, but the professional development that you're not getting in your schools. Anyway.

We're opening up the community at the end of the month, but right now you can get early bird pricing. 

So once the community opens up at the end of the month, it's going to be $100 per month. But if you join right now, you can get into the community as an early bird for only $89.00 a month, and you'll have that that rate for as long as you're in the community.

Now I need to tell you, I really mean that. So right now, for instance, Buildership University is 4997. At the time of this recording, enrollments close. For Buildership University, it's 4997-A year. But at the time of this recording, that's what it is. It's closed right now. I'm telling the price for a specific reason. There are people who are in Buildership University who got that early bird pricing who are paying $97.00 a month or $67 a month to be in Buildership University and they have been doing it and they got in early, they got that early bird pricing.

It's locked in. So the Buildership community, you know, I don't know what's going to happen in the future in terms of what that investment is going to be. But if you get in at that early bird pricing, we will never ever raise the price. The more we build it, the more, the more tools we put in, the more valuable it becomes. But you because you got in that early bird pricing, you will never ever do that. So if it the community is $200 a month, in the future, you're going to be paying still the $87.00 a month. But we're only doing this for the 1st 50 people in the community. So you need to go to buildershipuniversity.com/community to join the community.

Today we will have the grand opening, so I'll tell you more about it a little bit later. But if you feel like you need another tribe, if you feel like the voices in your ear don't support you, don't believe in you, and you want to go to a place where they will, that's what this community is all about. And so again, Buildership university.com/community to join. And then I'll tell you more about it as we get closer to the grand opening. So excited about what we're doing. Anyway, even if you don't join the community, be careful about the voices in your ear because we might think, oh, it's just a harmless conversation or oh, you know, it's just a tough meeting. But I only have to go once a month. But if you are not careful, over time, those voices can erode your passion.Those voices can make you doubt yourself and doubt your vision. Those voices can make you hesitate when you should be moving forward. 

So cultivate your tribe. 

Make sure that you're intentional about putting yourself in spaces with people who get you and believe in you. Make sure that you curate your tribe like a builder. I'll talk to you next time. If you're ready to get started being a builder right away, then I want to invite you to join us at Buildership University. It's our exclusive online community for builders just like you, where you'll be able to get the exact training that you need to turn your school into a success story right now with the people and resources you already have.

Inside you'll find our best online courses, live trainings with me, tons of resources, templates and exemplars, and monthly live office hours with me where you can ask me anything and get my help on whatever challenge you're facing right now. If you're tired of hitting obstacle after obstacle and you're sick of tiny little incremental games each year, if you're ready to make a dramatic difference in your school right now, then you need to join Buildership University. Just go to buildershipuniversity.com and get started writing your school success story today. Hey, it's Robin here and I want to thank you for listening to today's episode. Now, if you have a question about today's episode or you just want to keep the conversation going, did you know that we had a School Leadership Reimagined Facebook group? All you need to do is go to Facebook, join the school Leadership reimagined Facebook group. Now, they're going to be a couple of questions that we asked at the beginning because we want to protect this group and make sure that we don't have any trolls come in and that it really is for people who are principals, assistant principals, district administrators. So make sure you answer those questions or you won't get in.

But then we can keep the conversation going. Plus, we do a lot of great bonus content. I'm in there every single weekday. So if you have a question or comment about the episode, let's continue the conversation. Join us at the School Leadership Reimagined Facebook group and I'll talk to you next time.